Monthly Musing – February 2017 – My daughter, my friend
I was absolutely convinced, when I woke up on the morning of my
thirteenth birthday, that the world was going to be different. Having officially become a Teenager, there
was going to be a change that would be so noticeable that my life would never
be the same again. Sadly, when I opened
my eyes on my birthday morning, I felt exactly the same. No big fanfares, no lightning bolts to herald
the arrival of my teenage years, and nothing (apart from presents and birthday
cake) that made me any different from how I had been the day before.
I couldn’t tell you when exactly it was that things did seem
different. When I left school? Started my first job? Got married?
Had my children? The face that
looks back at me in the mirror is older, but I couldn’t tell you when exactly I
knew that the world really was different.
There was no defining moment, it happened as softly as a sunset turning
Which brings me back to this Musing.
On Friday night, my husband and I were supposed to be going out for the
evening – concert tickets that I had bought for him as a Christmas present and
an overnight stay in a city hotel where the concert was being held. Unfortunately, earlier in the week, my husband
hurt his back and by the evening of the concert we knew that he wouldn’t be
able to go. There was no refund on the
room or the tickets and not wanting to see them unused, my husband had an idea.
I went to the concert with a young woman. She’s stylish, beautiful, has a taste for
adventure and a great sense of humour.
She was fun to spend the evening with; we talked about all kinds of
things and laughed at the most ridiculous stuff, and although I wished that my
husband could have come too, he was happy knowing that the evening hadn’t been
My friend? None other than big
daughter, now old enough to appreciate nights out, share bottles of wine and
have conversations that don’t involve homework or whether she’s spending too
much time on social media. Instead, we
talk now about things we have in common, we watch films that we can both enjoy
(that aren’t made by Disney), we go to gym classes together and my baby is no
longer a baby. When did that
happen? When did she become that person
instead of the little girl she had been (it seems like) just a few years
before? Was it when she left
school? Went trekking in Peru? Started at university? There was no big fanfare, no lightning bolt
to herald the change; one day I just opened my eyes and there was my daughter –
and my friend. And the best thing of all
is that she wants to be my friend as well as my daughter, and I am very proud
to call her that. I’m a very lucky Mum.